Change is hard. Really hard. My favorite coach would always say, ‘if it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.’ Changing your routine or creating one all together is no exception. Researchers have found that routines can have far-reaching psychological benefits, including alleviating bipolar disorder, ADHD, and insomnia. To see more benefits to routines, see my first article on Daily Routines.

Here’s another bonus: routines allow you to carve out time to pursue your passion every single day. Yes, you read that correctly, time for your PASSION. What do you LOVE but don’t have time for? Once it’s part of a routine, there’s no more excuses preventing you from painting or writing or working on your business plan because you’re too tired or you can’t find the time.

It is easy for us to all agree on the benefits for routines. You wouldn’t be reading this far if you didn’t see the value. In the previous two articles, I’ve identified the importance of routines and the different routine clusters that make up your day, now it’s time to Get to Work. We can’t change our habits to get to that ideal day overnight, so we need to start with one segment at a time. You are not in this alone. I am going to do this with you.

First, you need to identify which area of your day needs the most love to start. For me, it is the Morning Routine. A HUGE work in progress for me. I am NOT a morning person AT ALL. Can you tell by all my BIG LETTERS? I sleep until the last second possible. I don’t enjoy working out in the mornings and survive thrive on coffee. If you ever schedule an 8 a.m. meeting with me on a Monday morning, I will be secretly planning your death, Susan. I know that isn’t healthy, and I really don’t want to see anything bad happen to Susan. I always hear about successful people that wake up early to attack their day. I want to be one of those people.

Thankfully, since my daughter must be at school early, I’m waking up an hour earlier this year than I did last year. That is an extra hour to develop morning habits. Here is my ideal morning schedule I’m working towards:

Wake up at 4:45 (currently I wake up at 6 (ish) – last year it was 7:30. I’m getting closer)
Drink a glass of water as soon as I wake up
5:00 a.m. Meditate
5:20 a.m. Get ready (dressed, brushed teeth, face washed)
5:30 a.m. Relax with coffee, Prayer/Journal/Read
6:00 a.m. Focus on getting my kid out the door. (She loves mornings as much as I do.)
7:00 a.m. Workout
8:00 a.m. Shower
8:15 a.m. Breakfast
8:30 a.m. Take Pickles on a gratitude walk or to the dog park. (Gratitude walk is where for the length of time that you are walking you are trying to name as many things as you possibly can that you are thankful for.)
9:00 a.m. Get into work projects

Now that you’ve mapped out your perfect routine, it’s time to do the work. The first step to getting to that perfect routine is to see how you actually use your time. If you have ever kept a food log for a diet, you are familiar with this process. This is not the time to lie to yourself. You must be honest in how much time in you day is wasted spent doing something unproductive. This involves tracking your behavior by half hour increments for a minimum of a week to see what your real behavior is.

“You must be honest in how much time in you day is wasted spent doing something unproductive. ”

Yeah Okay… I don’t have time to do the things in my day let alone track what I did do or shouldn’t do. Fine, if you don’t want to listen to me, then listen to the experts: Dr. Orma has some advice: “Sit down with a pad of paper and write out everything you do each day over the course of a week. See what you can cut or reduce. Then see what you can set as a normal routine, something you do at a set time each day or week. It has to work with your lifestyle. If you like to stay up late, getting up early as part of your routine may not work.”

See, even someone with Dr. in front of their name agrees with me. Keep a notebook, spreadsheet, note on your phone, or whatever works for you. Start by noting what time you actually woke up (not when you set your alarm for) and how you spent each 30-minute segment after that. Continue this until you are lights out, head on pillow where you note the time you are ‘really’ going to sleep. (Not when you go to bed to troll celebs’ Instagram feeds)

After doing this exercise myself, what I discovered was that on a regular basis, my routine varies. I am not consistent, and consistency is the key. When I kept track of my behavior over a period of time, here is what I saw was the ‘average’ for my current routine:

Going to bed around 11 p.m. (Ranges from 10:45-12:30 if I am extra frisky)
6:00 a.m. Wake up
6:30 a.m. Actually, wake up after hitting the snooze button a few (dozen) times. Sit in bed for 15 minutes convincing myself to get up and try to get my life together.
6:45 a.m. Rush to get my daughter ready for her day. (breakfast, packing lunches, getting her dressed, etc.)
7:00 a.m. Try to get my kid out the door on time (rarely happens, everyone is frustrated, tears shed)
7:10 a.m. Get ready for the day. Yes, I’ve been awake now for an hour without my teeth brushed. Gross.
8:00 a.m. Drink coffee/eat breakfast. Mindlessly scroll through social media.
8:30 a.m. check news articles, clean up email
9:00 a.m. get into work projects

Things that are missing:

Meditation
Working out (usually ends up happening in the late afternoon/evening instead)
Easing into my day (usually start off stressed out and everyone in my family feels it)
Any sense of accomplishment

As I mentioned before, I am NOT a morning person. Currently in my ‘actual’ routine, it takes me a solid 30 minutes to get out of bed. 30 minutes of me questioning if I actually need to wake up, can I possibly squeeze in another 5 minutes (because that would make any difference) and once I decide that yes I do need to get up, I spend 15 minutes mindlessly scrolling through my phone because I’m not ready to face the day. This bad habit became crystal clear to me once I went through this exercise.

The result of these bad habits is not only that I start my day stressed out and tired, but I am also missing important things for my mental health. The biggest one missing from this routine is the gym. Instead I’m going at night, in the late afternoon, or not at all. I know that if I am going to be successful, I’ve got to get to the gym in the am. The other big issue here is the inconsistency. It is hard to get into a good rhythm when your wake up and sleep time vary often.

According to the National Sleep Foundation, going to bed at the same time every night, and waking up at the same time each morning (yes, even on weekends) can help regulate the body's internal clock. Once you've fallen into the groove, you'll have a much easier time falling asleep, and then staying asleep. This is a great first step, even if you don’t wake up earlier per say, to establishing a consistent morning routine.

Now that you’ve identified your ideal routine and you’ve tracked your actual routine, see what is currently missing from it. Are you staying up much later than you’d like? Are you having trouble fitting in your workout? Are you like me and doing all of the above? Once you see the gaps in the real routine and the ideal, pick ONE thing to focus on. Just one. That will be your focus for the next 30 days. 30 days makes it a habit and you can move on to the next thing.

For me, my focus for the next 30 days is that when my alarm goes off, I am going to physically get out of bed instead of laying around for 30 minutes. Adding that 30 minutes into my morning of actually starting my day will get me closer to my big goal of working out in the mornings. How will I change this behavior? Instead of plugging my phone/alarm in next to the bed, I am going to start plugging it in the bathroom. This will force me to get up and walk across the room to stop the alarm. Is this a HUGE lifestyle change? No. That’s not what change is about. Real change is about making realistic adjustments in your life and sticking to it.

My ultimate goal is to wake up an hour and half earlier. Once I have gotten in the habit of not snoozing, I can start focusing on actually waking up earlier.

How to get there:

You want to make your goals realistic. Diets fail when you cut out everything from your diet that you love, go from never working out to working out an hour a day and weighing yourself daily. You will be frustrated, sore and tired after a few days, and most likely will binge eat until your weight is higher than you started. However, small changes, like swapping soda for water or taking the stairs instead of the elevator are things that could truly stick.

For my morning routine, I will be working on it 15 minutes at a time. Each week I will wake up 15 minutes earlier AND go to bed 15 minutes earlier. This schedule will take me 6 weeks to be in my new habit. It doesn’t happen overnight. It is not quick. But if you stick with it, you can get there!

Week 1:

Be asleep by 10:45
6:00 a.m. Wake up
6:15 a.m. Actually Wake up after hitting the snooze button a few times (Don’t judge me – it takes time and I’m trying to be realistic here)
6:20 a.m. Rush to get Zoe ready for her day. (breakfast, packing lunches, getting her dressed, etc.)
7:00 a.m. Get ready for the day
7:30 a.m. Take Pickles on a Gratitude walk
8:00 a.m. Drink coffee/Read/breakfast
8:30 a.m. check news articles, clean up email
9:00 a.m. get into work projects

(no new tasks added in but more time for Zoe and Pickles)

Week 2:

Be asleep by 10:30
6:00 a.m. Wake up and meditate
Drink a glass of water as soon as I wake up
6:20 a.m. Zoe ready for her day. (A little less rushing around)
7:00 a.m. shower/get ready for the day
7:30 a.m. Take Pickles on a Gratitude walk
8:00 a.m. Drink coffee/Read/breakfast
8:30 a.m. check news articles, clean up email
9:00 a.m. get into work projects

(Meditation is added back into my life!)

Week 3:

Be asleep by 10:15
5:45 a.m. Wake up and meditate
Drink a glass of water as soon as I wake up
6:00 a.m. Get ready (dressed, face washed)
6:20 a.m. Get Zoe ready for her day. (breakfast, packing lunches, getting her dressed, etc.)
7:00 a.m. Workout
8:00 a.m. Shower
8:15 a.m. breakfast
8:30 a.m. check news articles, clean up email
9:00 a.m. get into work projects

(Working out is now in my life, but Pickles is getting a little less morning love)

Week 4:

Going to bed at 10:00 p.m.
5:30 a.m. Wake up and meditate

Week 5:

Going to bed at 10:00 p.m.
5:15 a.m. Wake up and meditate

Week 6:

Going to bed at 10:00 p.m.
Wake up at 4:45
Drink a glass of water as soon as I wake up
5:00 a.m. Meditate
5:20 a.m. Get ready (dressed, brushed teeth, face washed)
5:30 a.m. Relax with coffee, Prayer/Journal/Read
6:00 a.m. Focus on getting my kid out the door.
7:00 a.m. Workout
8:00 a.m. Shower
8:15 a.m. Breakfast
8:30 a.m. Take Pickles on a gratitude walk or to the dog park.
9:00 a.m. Get into work projects

(perfect schedule!)

This is just an example of what adjusting just 15 minutes each week could do to get to your ideal schedule and routine. Now it is your turn. What are you going to adjust in your day to get you closer to that ideal routine? Let’s get to work!

Let’s get to work: Changing Habits